2 out of 5 Popcorn Kernels.
I knew from the opening scene of an aerial view of Philidelphia, that I really would have to be standing on my head to enjoy this latest from the mind, and only the mind of M.Night Shymalan's mind. That's right. There is so much going on in that head of his that ideas are just oooozing out his ears, ready for his young leages to swoop up and direct; namely John Erick Dowdle (Quarantine), and Brian Nelson (30 Days of Night) as screenwriter. They have been saddled with starting off what M.Night calls his "The Night Chronicles", so get ready, there may be two more of these movies heading your way.
Now I have to admit, the movie is watchable, in a B-Movie sort of way where as you walk in thinking this is going to be horror, but as soon as I saw the first victim, I realized this was turning into a comedy. The victim: a suicide who seemingly jumped from a high-story window many blocks away - not only landed with all body parts in-tact, but seemingly with little or no blood in sight. From that distance I would think in reality (even movie-reality) there wouldn't have been enough body mass for even Sponge Bob to have sucked up.
This is like the Lost episode of Survivor where five strangers are pulled together on an elevator, all having commited some sin in their lives, who must now deal with the greatest sin of all, and that is to have acting credits in this film. There is the Old Woman (Jenny O'Hara) who never stops nagging, the young woman (Bojana Novakovic) who never stops leering, the mattress salesman (Geoffrey Arend) who never stops...you guessed it...selling, the security guard (Bokeem Woodbine) a claustrophbic who never stops sweating, the mystery guest (Logan Marshall-Green) who never stops being...well a mystery. And of course, as our main guest, The Devil Himself, who may be among them, or who may be one of them, who actually needs to turn off the lights every time he actually has to kill someone. He's the Devil...can't he do one of those Darth Vadar mind-kills or something? Is he trying to kill the whole audience too by making us wade through this plot?
Well there is of course that suicide back in the beginning of our story, which is being investigated by a recovering drunk of a my-family-was-killed-and-i'll-be-dragging-that-along-with-my-film-career Police Detective (Chris Messina) who comes to the building in question only to find these strangers are trapped on an elevator. Why he didn't just take the other working elevators up to the floor in question, where the woman allegedly jumped in question, is my real question...but wait, that was NOT in the mind of M.Night was it? An actual cohesive plotline, imagine that. Well, he ends up watching this movie too, because he sits with the security guards as they watch the elevator passengers, and has deemed that THIS is more important than the previous dead body out there with no-blood on it. And wouldn't you know it, the building is lucky enough to have close circuit monitors to watch the elevators but the Devil has caused a malfunction in the speakers so the elevator victims can't hear.How lame is the Devil? But luckily the detective is blessed to be with the only security guard who received an advanced copy of the screenplay as recites all he knows about the devil, his grandmother, up-side jelly toast, the devil's purpose, how to appease him, when to get him some more jellyed toast, bla, bla, bla...
I like this idea, as I am sure the actors did too, but the execution is not the Twilight-Zone/Hitchcock feel I was hoping for. Each take the material too seriously, as if they were trying to Out-Act each other, and we are suppose to be thrown off the trail of the Devil with each body count...I just lost interest. I figured the real Devil was M.Night, because only the Devil would send out his minions to do his dirty work, and still claim credit.
But as always, one doth have to wait for that M.Night's final moment in the end of any film, when a plot twist doth reveal itself...and it doth...and I was twisted...wringing my hands at the fact that I WAITED for THAT! The Devil is a little pissed too. The audience is pissed as well. The concession stand is a little happy though. Oh well, see it if you must...or rent a good Hitchcock movie, and REALLY have a good time. Or see this one...and have a good laugh.
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